What Values Actually Are (And Aren't)
In Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), developed by Steven Hayes, values are defined as 'chosen life directions' — what matters most to you, independent of whether you're currently achieving it.
Values are not goals. Goals are achievable endpoints ('get promoted,' 'run a marathon'). Values are ongoing directions ('be a supportive colleague,' 'care for my health').
Values are not rules. Rules are rigid prescriptions ('I must exercise every day'). Values are flexible orientations ('I value my physical wellbeing and make choices that support it').
Values are not feelings. Feelings fluctuate constantly. Values remain stable even when emotions are chaotic.
This distinction is crucial. In the midst of trauma, depression, or overwhelming stress, you may not feel hopeful, motivated, or happy. But you can still act based on what matters to you.
The Research on Values and Resilience
Studies consistently show that people who engage in values-consistent behavior during difficult times show better psychological outcomes than those who wait to feel better before acting.
A 2019 study in the Journal of Contextual Behavioral Science found that trauma survivors who maintained values-based actions despite distress showed:
- Lower PTSD symptom severity
- Better functional recovery
- Higher reported quality of life
- Greater likelihood of post-traumatic growth
This isn't about willpower or forcing yourself to 'push through.' It's about having an anchor when everything else is unstable.
Viktor Frankl: The Ultimate Case Study
Viktor Frankl, psychiatrist and Holocaust survivor, wrote Man's Search for Meaning based on his observations in Nazi concentration camps. His central finding:
'Those who have a 'why' to live, can bear with almost any 'how.''
Frankl noticed that survival wasn't predicted by physical strength, age, or prior status. It was predicted by whether people could find meaning in their suffering.
For some, meaning came from connection to loved ones they hoped to see again. For others, from spiritual faith. For others, from witnessing suffering with dignity. The specific content mattered less than the presence of meaning itself.
This observation became the foundation of Logotherapy — a therapeutic approach centered on helping people discover and live according to their deepest values, even in circumstances they cannot control.
Values in Practice: What This Looks Like
Imagine two people experiencing severe depression:
Person A waits to feel better before engaging with life. 'When I have energy, I'll reach out to friends. When I feel motivated, I'll exercise. When the depression lifts, I'll start living again.'
Person B identifies their core value: 'Connection with people I care about matters to me.' Despite feeling exhausted and hopeless, they text a friend. Not because they feel like it. Because it aligns with what matters.
Research shows Person B recovers faster. Not because the action 'cures' depression, but because values-based action creates small moments of meaning, which accumulate into reasons to keep going.
Common Values Across Cultures
While specific values vary, certain themes appear across diverse cultural contexts:
- Family and relationships: Being a supportive parent, partner, friend, community member
- Contribution and service: Making a difference, helping others, leaving things better than you found them
- Growth and learning: Developing skills, understanding, wisdom
- Integrity and authenticity: Living in alignment with your principles, being genuine
- Health and vitality: Caring for your body, mind, spirit
The specific weight given to each varies by culture and individual, but the human capacity to find meaning through values appears to be universal.
Values Work in Resilience Training
Effective resilience programs include values clarification and values-based action planning:
This isn't toxic positivity ('just think positive!'). It's not suppression ('ignore your pain!'). It's the capacity to hold suffering while still choosing how you show up.
When life falls apart, values are what hold you together. Not by making the pain go away, but by giving you a reason to keep moving through it.